So, with Valentine’s day barely under our belts, I’ve been giving a lot of thought to my single status. I haven’t been single on Valentine’s day since I was in 7th grade. Honestly, it feels kind of empowering.
Being single on Valentine’s day seems to hold a heavier weight than it does any other time of year (although Thanksgiving-Christmas season is a close second). This feeling is very new to me, though, and I believe it has made me more conscious of my single-ness. I really believe being single is the best thing for me at the moment, and I decided to come up with a few reasons as to why. (And why you should embrace your single-ness)
1. I’ve become an all-around better driver.
This may seem weird at first but stick with me here. I had been relying on a man to drive to and from places all the time! He drove almost every time we went anywhere together, and we went places together often. These opportunities to better my driving skills were missed because I relied on my boyfriend to drive places.
Now that I’m single, I drive myself everywhere I need to go. I have had a LOT more practice behind the wheel because of this, and my driving has improved a lot! Don’t get me wrong, I still scare my friends every now and then, but feel much more confident behind the wheel than I ever have before.
This brings up an interesting question for me, actually. There’s this stupid stereotype that women are inferior drivers. Women are capable of driving just as well as men, but our opportunities to learn and practice driving are underdeveloped because we aren’t forced to practice as regularly as the men in our lives.
But anyways,
2. I’m More Outgoing
I often think back to how I behaved socially when I was in a relationship, and compare it to how I try to behave now. When I had a boyfriend, we often hung out with his friends and talked to people he knew (which was a lot of people). I used to count on him to help keep the conversation going, and I would chime in when I felt like it.
Now that I’m single, I have only myself to rely on to keep a conversation going with someone I don’t know very well. I used to really struggle to make conversation with anyone really, but lately, I’ve been finding it easier and easier to hold long conversations and talk to people I don’t know. I credit my break up for this because it forced me to speak for myself.
3. I’m Finding Myself
I am finally going after my dreams people. I’ve let who I was with dictate so many aspects of my life. I went to a college close to home for my boyfriend. I wanted to be close to him so I settled for a school I wasn’t even sure I wanted to attend. I swore it wasn’t for him, but I knew it was.
Now that we’re broken up, I feel like I have so much freedom. I decided I want to start my own business. I want to be my own boss someday, and I know I can do it. These dreams are something I would’ve never pursued if I was still tied down to a relationship. I’ve been able to realize what I actually want in life, and believe in my ability to go after what I want. I’m still in the process of finding myself, though I feel like it’s a lifetime process.
4. I Have Newfound Confidence
The only person I depend on for happiness is myself now. At first, this was hard for me. I was so used to depending on someone else for happiness, I lost my ability to find it within myself. I was so broken when we broke up, and I had no idea how to put myself back together alone. I still struggle with this, but I know now that took a lot for me to pick myself back up. I’m realizing how much I respect myself for it.
I now hold myself a little higher than I did before. I’m not as hard on myself as I used to be. I respect the struggles I’ve been through; I’m realizing how strong I actually am. I know my worth and how I deserve to be treated, and I’m not settling for anything less than that.
Going through a breakup is never easy. I know it sounds cliché, but time really helps heal a broken heart. I think couples entangled in toxic relationships often get back together because they don’t realize the time it actually takes to truly get over someone. Give yourself some time, I swear it will be worth it. It’s completely fine to be single! Embrace your singleness because you deserve it!
I hope you’re having a great day or night!
xoxo, Lauren
Lauren's Lovely Life 